some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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