Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
