So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
