We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
