the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Randomize
