she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Randomize
