Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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