? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize