I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Randomize
