oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Randomize
