The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
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