he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
