Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
