It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
