well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
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