I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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