im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
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