so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Randomize