i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
worst night to have a conscience
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize
