Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
