Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
You pole danced in your parka.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
