Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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