THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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