you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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