omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
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