When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
