He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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