Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Randomize
