they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize