I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize