worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Randomize