She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
