I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
