I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
