Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Randomize
