redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
