she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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