Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
