If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
