You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize