I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
