No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
