Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Randomize
