I want to stick my p in your. b.
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Randomize
