Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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