There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
