he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
