I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
You pole danced in your parka.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Randomize