Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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