shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
