I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I will be naked everywhere
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
